Week 5 and 6

Monday: 
The first day of the week and the first night of 3 in a row. I planned to spend the day relaxing on the beach but the north wind and rain put quite a damper on that. It was relatively frustrating the i reminded myself that it was rain and not snow. I am blessed. It also gave me time to catch up with family and friends. It started with one of my best friends, Alexis, and her husband and baby Maisyn. I was used to seeing her every week, then COVID hit, then she moved, then I moved and now we are here. We promised to make FaceTiming a more frequent date because we both need the mental break that comes with talking. I’m thinking next time we might even play country music and line dance over video because we can’t do it in person right now. I cannot wait to go back to dancing when COVID becomes less of a hinderance. 

God moment: So I’ve been listening to “The Bible in a Year with Fr. Mike Schmitt” since January and sometimes the quick sermons after the reading just hit me in the gut. He was saying how lscripture could be a flashlight, mirror or sandpaper for us. The flashlight shines light on something we may not see, a mirror reflects some attribute in us and the sandpaper can smooth out some of our rough edges. He said God sometimes asks us when do we want our burdens alleviated and like the Pharo we say, tomorrow. Think of how many times you say “I’ll just do that tomorrow.” I know I’ve done it with both the good and bad. I don’t want His strength now because I want to hurt or I would rather take the pain of sin over surrendering it to God. Even today I was debating not doing my cardio workout because I wanted to be lazy. I started it, with the podcast in the background and that message came through. Yep, punch in the gut. When I don’t want to listen to Him with my heart He comes through my human senses so I cannot deny it. I find myself constantly calling upon the Lord and then trying to take it back. I need to work on accepting His gifts, not just the visible but the invisible: not just the ones in the world, but the ones inside of me.  After this revelation, and the end of my cardio workout, I got to join in on Taco Night! 
       This was my favorite day of the week so being able to somewhat spend it with family is a blessing. I caught up with my cousins, uncles, aunt and grandma! It’s fun listening to their weeks and having one on one time with each of them. If I was in person we would all be talking together but this gives me an opportunity to talk to them individually. Even though it pains me not to be surrounded by them, this is a blessing because I get to know my cousins on a more individual level. After hanging up with them my first real bout of homesickness kicked in. I never got “homesick” in college or even on my last assignment. Yes, I would miss home and want to be around my family but never did I have such a yearning to leave where I was and be home. I keep telling myself I think I could stay in Hawaii for a few years but I really don’t think that’s the case. God is blessing me with experiences like I’ve never known but Hes also blessed me with a family like no other. It’s hard but I have to surrender all my worries of the future to God and try not to take it back. Hahaha. 

Tuesday& Wednesday
So I’ve written both of these days a million times but they keep deleting. So I gave up for over a week. I’m seriously writing this on the Friday of the second week because I was busy and I didn’t want to write my words over and over.  Work and sleep summed up these days so you didn’t miss much.

Thursday: 

Today i laid down for a few hours before I hung out with Janet. She is a traveling nurse that is here with her boyfriend for work, but sadly they leave Saturday. A chance meeting at the tide pools lead to a day trip to North Shore. The conditions were horrible for surfing or being in the water in general so we just sat on the beach with our lunch and talked. Apparently the tree we sat by was a famous one, that you can find on many postcards. At one point I had my back to the ocean (so smart of me) and it came up all the way to my chest as I was lying on my towel. I’m not kidding we were a good 20feet from where the shoreline was and the waves got to us. Out of no where, a good 30min later, another wave hit and started to take away all of our stuff. I don’t think I have ever jumped up so fast. We did end up learning from this wave and scooted up. A couple that was sitting down a ways had the same thing happen to them, but they had expensive cameras that the ocean started to take. Thankfully nothing got too wet and we saved it from being taken out to sea. After the beach we went to get shaved ice. We went with the special and let me tell you, it was delicious! I never thought beans with ice cream and shaved ice would be good. That’s the thing about trying new things, sometimes you discover a diamond in the rough and sometimes you don’t. You won’t know unless you try. For dinner we met up with her boyfriend, and another couple that he worked with. Mai Tais and good times were had by all. She was even a dear and payed for the meal we split. Kindness from a stranger hits me differently because I don’t fear that it has motives. I could not repay her, at the next meal or in time because I may never see her again. It was just the goodness of her heart that prompted her to give selflessly. The laughs and the company was blessing enough for me but the meal was an added perk. I hope to have a chance to pass her kindness along in the coming weeks. https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1VUsrTbwD4r4dYGof8fp7R1ih_55F8DbUhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1CKkjUbqa1UVhmb1xPgerDufe5R3l_Zeyhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1j1upS5O7CbvzPJtDEpleJ-l94cN_LNymhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1pPr1pM75UdhqYlZNa8V6jD1n0d5ylD7chttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1l9CfErDzGPjZ0MYB1eaxzQ6PPvAWnGidhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1ANHDYEGLVJ4DkDOFiwCUuo7fEDodjkaj
Friday!    Koko head was conquered this morning at 23:49. I’ve missed a week or two but I’m back on track now. Below is a picture of what I show you vs how I actually feel. I also have to work tonight before JILL COMES IN! So excited for someone to go adventuring with. Before I went to bed I checked my mailbox and I had letters from my cousins. They each took the time to write me something. I think something got in my eye because they started watering. Letters are my favorite thing to recieve but also give. It means that someone took enough time to sit and think about you and write to you. It’s simple and some think outdated but it’s way more rewarding giving and receiving letters compared to texts or emails or whatever kids are doing these days. Gosh sometimes I really wish I lived in a different century. https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1wcV3h-7L7hSG7HoYRZSCiFAPeMkzGxkWhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1mBRGGgQHgnjXHUgXgr0ljCd1YqeS9XQHhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1hIELIKmTj24fIB3Q3VyP0mRfW1qZDRJGhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1LODaSfCK5rNcIAWf7PUhMxy01nUFiM8Shttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1nqpdtXy1UAPnsH8RfZ13s1GwgheK7lxV

Saturday:    I actually stayed up for a few hours after my shift because Jill and I went to a farmers market. We got açaí bowls, and got in trouble for trying to eat them there. Due to COVID we could not sit and enjoy the food we bought there. We also got some different, local fruits to try! After my eyes tried to close on me a few times, we went home so I could sleep. After waking up, we went to the Halona Blowhole. She rented a hero for her time here, so obviously we had to take the top off and drive it down the coast.  At the blowhole we were able to swim and jump from the coast into the water. There was even a cave that we walked through and then army crawled the rest of the way out. Upon arrival to her Jeep, we found a parking ticket. We did park illegally but so do a lot of people. Oops maybe next time we will double check before leaving our car. When we got home I saw that she had a horrible sunburn. I don’t know how many times I warned her and told her that she needed sunscreen! I’ve had bad sunburns myself so I tried to spare her the pain. Thankfully it was only on her arms because we think she got it while driving.  She even came to mass with me at night and God blessed us with a beautiful sunset. We made dinner and had drinks on the beach, to end the night. We turned in early because tomorrow we are going to lanikai for the pill box hike.https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1BoH_UA2RSHx6gK9G3HR0_6mdqYzXsXNchttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1O1_fCHzVz5Rm8zX373aWoiNY4lq-QP0dhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1PpJhL2WxNda9yKaxOf1eH-mhD0TooqSmhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1v8-3BLWWj4XuBKODGlaasmDuc3NE6SoChttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1oUuJFnO20aODTfGQaJENNGcEPNZXJ1Tmhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=15JcYOxx6DsCfJFUAZONcGgwTmHMe0IrAhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1KUpviwHaiZjIMDgKaqNJueytx9nxbR6shttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=109zL0N-sFXnkSVvODozrgpTy2UsOb8Zo

Sunday:    Jill was cracking me up. Within the first 40 yards (if that) she was asking how far away we were from the top. The whole trail is an incline so I knew we were in for it when she asked. I just had to keep telling her the view was worth it. In the end she did agree that the view was worth the pain. On the way down she said that she looked like an imposter because she had hiking boots on. I replied that the ability to hike didn’t come with the purchase of the shoes. We both died laughing at that one. Last night she was convinced she was going to do Koko head because some guy we met talked her into it. After today she realized that it wouldn’t be a good idea. After hiking, we worked up an appetite and had breakfast and went to another farmers market. When we got home, I had a call from Allen, my neighbor, asking what we were doing. We met him at the North Shore, where we sat on the beach or were in the water, while he was surfing. Jill left early because she was tired and drained from being in the sun. I’ve heard about these wild pigs that roam the island but I didn’t get to see them until today! It’s the little things in life that can give me such joy.    Allen took my home and on the drive we started talking about religion. I love hearing everyone’s opinion on it because it helps me understand them a little bit better. It also helps me see my religion or religions in general from a different perspective. I think the problem in our society is we don’t discuss the hard stuff it because we don’t learn how to respect difference of opinion. This is why I love my friends. Many of them have radically different views but through discussion we question, challenge and ultimately learn more than we would have without getting through the tough stuff. Allen’s view was that if I was stuck in my belief then there was no point of discussion. I tried to enlighten him that learning doesn’t have to mean changing but he would have none of it. For one of the first times in my life I actually raised my voice in anger to someone else and told him to shut it and listen for 2 min. He kept looking at the clock and that’s when I knew even though he was “open” to learning about all different religions, he was the one who didn’t want to change or even grow. He said that there was no point to the conversation we just had because no one was going to change. He discounted the fact that I learned a new perspective or learned something new about him. When we got back I was actually so frustrated that I made an excuse and left. I can handle people of different faiths, races or whatever makes us unique but hypocrites just grind my gears. Oh well. https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1ltB94g_wflR4qelfCfso5AdkkxB3hFsPhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1zul8goED-swJf_fDKXc9hxf9cSmNZZ2Ehttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1_6Tos4gGr42JrqpLODLAfkcmFK8T0Avshttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1zDAyLHllxFugGdrjdDDw9MWcuSvLkjQkhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1eyXvKRj15Qndnh7G2S2-PqUIOVQpuRL1https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1XC3F8SbWFmQg4GAEf9mcVOhS3_-_AnINhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=18DWXdSPeUEA6PdjLg7mhPzG7UAu0fyvw

Monday:  I died laughing. So as I’m driving to my surf lesson, I was listening to my Bible podcast. Fr Mike said something that struck me and made me thing of my conversation from yesterday. He said “ God first came and established a relationship and then He created the rules.” Many times I have heard that the Catholic Church only cares about rules and that is even a point that Allen brought up. They are rules but the rules were made to bring us closer to God. Like any good and healthy relationship there are standards and expectations so that both parties are loved appropriately. People hear “thou shall not...” and see a limitation but it’s actually is an open door to love fully. God is helping us distinguish what “not” to do, so we don’t have to make the mistake to learn the lesson. We are human and make mistakes and thus sin, but when we strive to go according to the “rules” we don’t waste time loving incorrectly, but learn the right way to love and be loved. God used Allen to enlighten me on another way view not only my relationship with Him but also the value of His commandments.     If you’re still wondering about my first comment, yes I learned to surf today! I’ve been on a board before, while in NYC but nothing crazy. I booked a group class but the other people booked a private group so I ended up getting a private lesson. After a few waves my instructor commented on my stance. I apologized for using my gun stance rather than the proper one. He was taken back but I explained that I saw the gun on his leg and that’s why I even mentioned it. In between waves and discussing surfing we talking about guns. It cracked me up because only this would happen to me. My final waves I did without a push or even him telling me when to stand up. Maybe I’ll be able to get the hang of it one day. 
After Jill got off work we hiked to Maunawili falls. I’ll just let the pictures do the talking on that one. She was scared to jump at first but near the end we jumped together and she couldn’t get enough of it. We were chasing daylight on the way back, but we made it! 
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1839qjVFqownk1C46eyI2bVkICmj7TRqchttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1k6JDcdyxcwoF0XrPEz0nj-fV0kwnS0JVhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1YXj-ibZqI9d2DKtsuiOTjU0EyFetoq20https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1qW71tigZ6a_D06jg2MOPLAYUQz97Qlughttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=155rFd8k701YR7eOUc9_99lwd5pcQDnmBhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1uxNM3XizafwmCqeNh8p8iwZLhRWa7uAbhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1tJR8Z79nE8_uBDiAsdYl3bR_YcCUs24Rhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1RaGlRJZUaPtBHnTAI8VCqScGLknrQrfihttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1Br1ApZuMt6x329fC8vjDSRP_mDBNYLIRhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=129lcin9PTgfvAmZjFDJAZGGp3vxuLmFa
Tuesday and Wednesday : work work work    I did do Koko head for sunrise and let me tell you, it was worth it 1000 times over. Something I’m going to have to do again. Obviously pictures do no justice but I will try.   I also have one thing to say about Med Surg nurses. They really work their butts off all the time. It’s a whole different kind of nursing that I couldn’t do. My hats off to you. The past two nights I was floated to a Med Surg unit and I was tasking all night. I felt like I didn’t really know my patients like I normally do. I am so lucky that I started in the ICU because I would have been driven nuts on the floor. https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1cV-J-ef6ugi7pYDa_gfZgdEld6jgl-PMhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1YerTN98pODk8i6mopRJDt9VJJIxh_3Aohttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1RVx3Ig8tpE6qnlSeb-3Fr9MdPkZLGUJthttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1-m-A10brHyY9Ymm4GSEtkZ-nOJRN825I
Thursday: We did the tourist thing and dressed up and walked around Waikiki. We happy hour hopped and obviously got the girliest and touristy drinks on the menu. None of them were a disappointment. https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1n_Iu5vBuN77YzVvCvYpzH9FsIJzQ3A_bhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1F2AFEI4HhKO40SbsX75zXkISSnArWEEehttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1a5q3emriogJOVx9iZPLHGVh_3Jd6rmgLhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1nXaqkgOv80v89ISc13BLbEOPMdRF6zGZhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=17MMCf8PFIDKPNia0i_WdiyAaB0PywblE

FridayA day of relaxing before working the night shift. 
Saturday:
Work. Sleep. Eat. And Eat some more. Valentine’s Day came early for night shift and there were way too many good things to try. 
Sunday: Happy Valentine’s Day! I have to work tonight but jill and I planned on going to the Dole plantation and a coffee bean farm inbetween sleep and my shift. The colors in the Dole garden are ridiculous. Bright and vibrant pinks, greens, yellows, oranges and so many more line the pathways. No matter where you turned there was a different color, or plant. It was crazy beautiful! Jill and I couldn’t stop making remarks about it.       I also learned how to properly pick out a pinapple and then cut it.  Fun Fact: they take 18-22 MONTHS to grow. Now I know why they are so expensive! Across the street there were pineapples as far as the eye could see and they were all at different stages of gestation. We stopped and got some dole whip which was made from the pineapples that they grew. That was delicious. It started to rain as we left so we couldn’t walk around the coffee bean farm but we did get a cup to go. Jill dropped me off at the front because it was raining and I had a white tank top. I ran from the car through TWO front row parking spots. Neither of us noticed it and she parked far away. Our stupidity gave us a good laugh. The coffee and tea were both delicious. The coffee was a perfect way to prepare me for yet another night shift.      Somehow dayshift kicked everyone but two patients out of the ICU. Those patients were both mine and then I only had a charge nurse with me. I actually am finishing up this blog during my break because I don’t want to forget again. Don’t mind my solo Valentine’s Day shoot. The sky was too pretty not to! https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1wI6Tn19XWzQs64nODp6CTOMD8pGvd9URhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1TRG8N7SVcGxQ-t6KGB0BHkKS6XLd3HTL 
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1s-fY7_d5wgjgOHQIxdMsbduTfDC6Klujhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1bWXcJyPqORT9gh7DbDhZrk9nigHdg-TXhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1w-V4Ra3evJuTvXXp2mNvaw1bnMduNPV1https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1ka5wH4Ook0QhkC8j4fTAM6nD0EoR9CY-https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1iw1vRhTubKUJiImb-MegbiyyCw2Fd7fThttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1uKu84KmahsnM0zeYPQq9DqF3p1IQzcJ6https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1HIqLlJNiablnYcWfse6zESuZ0zlRqgUUhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1MnDB02nx849xq86EDdl79qO7NDvpEIeo

So I guess that’s it. Mahalo for you patience and endless support! 

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